crazyginger98

I spent an hour staring at this screen trying to find the words to describe what is going through my mind. After the hour passed, I realized that the words will not come to me. The words may exist, but I have lost them. I have lost them the same way I have lost my tears. I cannot cry anymore. I don't know why, but it just doesn't happen. Words......that's all these are, just words. After an hour, I realized the only idea I could successfully convey is how pathetic I feel, how much I'm starting to hate myself, and how redundant I've become. I'm always on the side line waiting, trying to keep quiet, and letting everyone else be happy, but I eve

So much confusion and so much pain with every decision there is no gain I know what I want and I know what i need but I can't be blunt for fear I will plead The words from me I want to speak cannot be free for I am weak To let you know and to let you see is a deffinite no because there is no we You'll never read this for that I am glad You'll remain in bliss for that I am sad I have this aweful feeling that remains at a stand but you would be reeling if I tried to hold your hand

Since I stepped back and thought this through I realized I don't love you I'm sorry to say don't be upset I must take my hand away but no need to fret But why does it feel like everyone's gone It's like I'm not real and I've always been wrong The sudden silence except murmers and whispers but I turn to find no one save you and the flaming halo that hangs over your head so now I ask what's true I ask you, What's happening? Why do my friendships feel dead?

Admitting the love Admitting the want Admitting the need Admitting the fear My feelings show and suddenly I see away you go you're leaving me I just don't know how not to fail how not to fall and how not to go I'm so uncertain and so confused do I misunderstand or is this true Don't play with me it's just not fair Don't toy with me it's so unclear I don't know and I don't know where to go or what to show I don't know and I don't know how I've faired and I'm so scared

Love is ignored and love toss aside You looked the other way and my feelings were denied With a single moment when my mind screamed a plea our lips connected as you acknowledged me For so long I've felt all alone but in this short song I felt like I was home What it meant to me was that you finally see each and every plea to try and be happy Acknowledging these feelings Acknowledging the trust Acknowledging what could be even if it's not a must

Here in this Valley we have a brotherhood We have formed this family as I truely hoped we could

I am like the shore yet not at all there is so much more This shore has no elements to wash away the marks left as remnants There is no sun shine to dry this sand cold and damp this shore is mine The water is still becoming stagnant and polluted no waves here to wash what is ill With every step every footprint as a reminder of the pain that I've kept There is nothing here anymore nothing but these marks of pain and a reminder of all the gore

Alone in the mist quiet and undisturbed I am never missed and my efforts are curbed My mind wanders to places that cause me great fear All the unfammilliar voices and faces now they are all I hear I see things I wish would stop and fear they will come true I hope to come out on top but death I see for you I never speak of what I see or tell you what I think Insane I know you'd think of me and I'm already on the brink The actions I see myself doing Why can't I flee instead of going There is no reason to tell to you but I've commited treason this is very true I tell you not and stay silent I know you forgot no reason

The reason we have problems is because of who we are who we become and who we are with The reason we have problems is because of who we grew up to how they treated us and how we treat others The reason we have problems is because of choices made not only by ourselves but by those we trust The reason we have problems is because we trust because we love and because they betray The reason we have problems is because we feel because we have passion and because . . . we're emo

You think I care You think I want to be here You are so unaware The truth is what you fear You call yourself my mother But this is a lie for sure For I have found another And my love for her is pure A drowning child An inocent heart But now it is wild And you made it start Each word from you Pushes me further But why is this true You never nurture One moment in time And you broke my soul Your ignorant crime And now there's a hole Love from me Never Set me free Sever Why do I want to leave You'll never see this true Because I need to breathe And because I hate you